the_ButterflyEffect's Xanga

Thursday, March 25, 2004

Thu, 25 Mar 2004 14:14:26 GMT

NEW XANGA...ehhh ? www.xanga.com/FellOnMyForehead

it's still being uhh constructed?

Monday, March 22, 2004

Mon, 22 Mar 2004 14:27:31 GMT

MONDAY // March 22, 2oo4
( sorry, but no NEW VOCABULARY today )

I know I don't blog as much as I used to...but just in case there are those who are in need of an update, you can visit my ading ivy's xanga [ www.xanga.com/preciouspn4y ] and search for blog Friday, March 19 which should update you some.

I guess I'm going to have to do a bit of blogging too. Last Friday ading Ivy, ading Vanessa, Viet, and me went to the movies to watch Secret Window. Ading Ivy and I were SO SCARED, but it wasn't scary at all. Ading Ivy, " I was more scared of Vanessa than the movie ". Awww !! Haha, you two are crazy ! Vanessa kept whispering...MUFASA, haha. After the movie we saw a couple of friends from Valle Lindo, and talked a bit. AND *GASP* the night was over, so we all said our goodbyes and...uhh hi =]. Haha, yeah I hugged Viet. ^_^

HEY, if we're going to go hang out again, can it please be somewhere other than the mall !? x_x I've spent so much money...I don't think I have enough money for excel if we're still going this Tuesday. Like...let's go to the movies...wait that still costs money...ummm ? Well I guess we could still hang out at the mall, but I'm not taking my wallet with me this time. I'm officially...BROKE. Hahaha...well that's it for now...

Ms.Devyn, the end.

Tuesday, March 16, 2004

Tue, 16 Mar 2004 19:48:00 GMT

TUESDAY // March 16, 2oo4
NEW VOCABULARY:
lexicons - A stock of terms used in a particular profession,
subject, or style, a vocabulary

YUP. NEW LAYOUT, again. I got bored of the old one, and I'm taking advantage of this time while my dad is at a meeting. Long story, but okay. Basically my grandma caught my brother *cough*JORDAN*cough* on the computer with one of his friends looking at...inappropiate things and I'm getting penalized for his actions, in other words; NO COMPUTER, unless given permission, but when have I ever gotten permission from my dad when I've actually asked? By the way, that was a retorical question.

Spring break just started yesterday, and it feels like it's the worst ever...well not the worst, but you get the picture.

*<edit> I REALLY REALLY WANT TO START A BAND. I CALL DRUMS. </edit>

Ms.Devyn, later haters.

Sunday, March 07, 2004

Sun, 07 Mar 2004 16:28:02 GMT

SUNDAY // MARCH o7, 2oo4
NEW VOCABULARY:
tanoshi ( a Japanese term, I think ) - lovely

Yes, NEW LAYOUT and NEW SONG; First Date, Blink 182. I really don't feel like blogging right now ... sorry kiddos

^ It was that guy's birthday yesterday...happy birthday viet...the song on my xanga, dedicated to you.

I wonder if you found that stupid card yet. x_x Don't ask...

Ms.Devyn ; wish upon a star

Thursday, February 19, 2004

Thu, 19 Feb 2004 01:17:26 GMT

WEDNESDAY // February 18, 2oo4
NEW VOCABULARY:
inquisitive - 1. Inclined to investigate; eager for knowledge
2. Unduly curious and inquiring

Gloomy, windy day. Great, now I'm giving weather reports. Please try to note the sarcasm made in that statement. The highlight of today was during period 2, human performance and well being when we were given the honor to participate in the viewing of a play called Mirror, Mirror presented by Lamb's Player Theatre ( someone please correct me if I'm wrong ). Anyways the performance was very thought-provoking and you can really relate to what the performers "message". Later on in the day, it rained during class, but when school was dismissed it stopped and that really put me in a bad mood. Not to mention how cold it was, but I suppose I can blame that fault on myself for being so ignorant and not taking a jacket to school.

Almost had a stroke of poetic inspiration, but it faded away. Which reminds me...if you had read my last blog, you know that there were these mystery initials under a poem I composed in about 4th or 5th grade and Viet's guess seems the closest, if not correct. If you haven't noticed it in the chatterbox, his guess was " Devyn's True Love "...

Ms.Devyn, take my hand...I love you.

Tuesday, February 17, 2004

Tue, 17 Feb 2004 01:56:05 GMT

MONDAY // February 16, 2oo4
NEW VOCABULARY:
effable - capable of being uttered or explained; utterable
resplendent - splendid or dazzling in appearance; brilliant
( Today's vocabulary words provided by Mr.Viet. Much thanks. )

Today I was going through some of my old notebooks and on one of the pages found this:

My heart aches so badly with pain
Almost to the point where no one could sustain
Can't you see, I'm falling for you
I wish you could say you loved me too
But this could only happen in my dreams
Without your love, I'd die it seems
So for -

and it was never finished. There was no detication, no date, nothing except for the letters " D x T x L " and I have no idea whatsoever that could mean. I'm guessing I wrote this when I was in 4th or 5th grade, but there's no conclusion I could come to about anything else. Short-term memory loss bites.

Ms.Devyn, until next time.

Thursday, February 12, 2004

Thu, 12 Feb 2004 01:10:32 GMT

WEDNESDAY // February 11, 2oo4

all I have to say is...I cried 3 tears...one for each of those special words...and as you turned away, I whispered those words and wonder if you heard me...

Ms.Devyn, nothing left to say.

Tuesday, February 10, 2004

Tue, 10 Feb 2004 02:38:32 GMT

MONDAY // February o9, 2oo4
NEW VOCABULARY:
provocative - tending to provoke or stimulate

What have I gotten myself into?
I just had to buy those stupid tickets to that stupid dance that I probably won't even go to.

Besides that, not much else is going on...FOUR MORE DAYS UNTIL DISNEYLAND !! Almost forgot to mention that. Did I mention cameras are evil ?

Not so much to blog about today...or maybe it's just the fact that I'm not in the mood for it? Either one, or the possibility of both. Use your judgement.

Ms.Devyn, don't think.

Tuesday, February 03, 2004

Tue, 03 Feb 2004 23:51:03 GMT

TUESDAY // February o3, 2oo4
NEW VOCABULARY:
implusive - 1. Inclined to act on impulse rather than though
2. Having force in power to impel or incite; forceful

I had this strange lingering craving for french toast. Not just any french toast though, it had to be from Denny's. AHH !! It's making me go crazy because I know I won't be able to end this "fixation". I'm fixated on that word fixation. I learned that word from a book I just finished reading recently called Tenderness by Robert Cormier. It's an okay book I guess. There's this teenage girl who has "fixations" on these guys and pursues to end these fixations to get on with life, but she soon finds herself fixated with Eric Poole, a serial killer. Go read the book if you want to find out what happens to Lori (teenage girl) and Eric Poole. Ehh, that sounded corny kind of.

And the torture goes on !! Next Wednesday there's a Valentine's Day Dance. *whoohoo* It's not like anyone would ask me anyway. Here's what I have to say about Valentine's Day:

Valentine's day is a sorry excuse of a holiday to make the people who have no signifigant other to share it with feel lonely and unloved, but more importantly encouraging the most evil manipulative affection that we call love. I quote a friend of mine who will be known as anonymous once said that love is the desire of every human but is the never-ending cycle of pain and torture. I might add that love is nothing but an illusion and blinds us so that we commit to something that isn't there. So to those who wonder if I have a "valentine" to share this consumer-driven holiday the answer is get a life.

To express this deep fixated affection would mean nothing to you.

I can't stop listening to these ~~stupid~~ love songs like "Always on my Mind", "You Don't Know My Name", and "Walk Me Home" (the one on my xanga). I think I hang out with ading Ivy and ading Amanda too much, but I don't think that's the case. LOVE...so evil, yet so...

Ms.Devyn, not like this before.

Sunday, February 01, 2004

Sun, 01 Feb 2004 23:28:34 GMT

SUNDAY // February o1, 2oo4
NEW VOCABULARY:
eloquent - forceful and persuasive in speech

Here are just some poems that I've written in previous xangas, that I just can't leave behind. The last one was the most recent.

So Much To Tell You
So much to tell you
But I can't find the words
I pushed away so hard
That I was left unheard
But deep down inside
I wanted you to hear me
Except it backfired
And no one was willing
So here I sit more lonely than before
I tried so hard to call through that closed door
I banged my fists until they bled
The blood stained the door with a deep red
And for the rest, it need not be said

Held Prisoner
To painful to hear
The things you say
My mind won't stop replaying that heartless day
I held back my tears
In fear of what you'd do
No words you have said could ever be true
There is no hope
Left inside of me
There is no faith that I can see
It's not or never
And I pick now
I'll find a way to escape somehow

[ no title...yet ]
Dark sickled moons rest beneath my eyes
Scratch out the deceits, erase the lies
But the dried blood stains won't fade away
As for the wounds I can't not say
Such icy walls I dare not touch
A place for my head, there is none such
To push me aside is your reaction
But one rule, failure is not an option

Ms.Devyn, I'm done.